Last week, someone called me and told me that they had contemplated taking their own life. They had reached a point where they had made preparations and were sitting in their room contemplating whether they should go through with it. And then, while looking around the room, they noticed something on their small altar. Something shifted in that moment, and instead of going through with it, they decided to call me.I’m not sharing this story to sensationalise suicide, and I don’t want us to focus on the details of what happened. What stayed with me was the question that came…

In the first part of this series, we explored what narcissism actually is and why the word has become so misunderstood. In Part 2, we looked at how narcissistic patterns can show up in everyday behaviour, and why they aren’t always as obvious as the stereotype suggests. But understanding the pattern is only the beginning. In Part three we ask the more important question: What do you actually do when you recognise it?Knowing that someone may have strong narcissistic traits doesn’t automatically tell you how to respond. And if you’re not careful, trying to understand another person’s behaviour can become…

Part two of a three-part series on narcissism.Narcissism has become one of the internet’s favorite insults. We throw the word around to describe selfish people, difficult bosses, arrogant celebrities, or toxic ex-partners. But somewhere along the way, the real meaning of the term got lost.A year into studying psychology, I realised just how much this misunderstanding matters. I realized something that surprised me: narcissism isn’t just a buzzword or a personality flaw. At its extreme, it’s a clinically recognized pattern of thinking, feeling, and behaving, one that many people don’t understand until they experience its effects firsthand. And that’s what…

Part one of a three-part series on narcissism. Say the word “narcissist” out loud and watch what happens. A face comes to mind. An ex, a boss,a  manipulative friend, a parent, maybe. It’s become a label we place on people who have hurt us, a way of drawing a line between them and us. Someone else’s problem, filed neatly under them, not me.But narcissism was never meant to describe a rare, villainous type of person. Long before it became internet shorthand for “toxic,” it was a word psychologists used to describe something far more universal, a form of self-love that begins…

There’s a particular kind of silence that lives in the body of someone who grew up in an unsafe home. It isn’t the absence of feeling, it’s the absence of permission to show it. And long after the home is gone, the silence often stays. If you’ve ever found yourself unable to say what you actually feel, even when it matters, even when the words are right there, then this is for you.What “Unsafe” Actually MeansUnsafe doesn’t only mean violence. It can mean unpredictability, a household where you never knew which version of a parent would walk through the door.…

There’s a particular kind of poverty nobody talks about. It doesn’t show up on a balance sheet. You can have the house, the car, the label on your bag, and still be living in it. I’m talking about being a poor person who happens to have a lot of possessions.You’ve met this person. You might have been this person. Nothing is ever enough. There’s always a next acquisition standing between them and the feeling they’re actually chasing, which was never the object in the first place. It was always a state, peace, satisfaction, the sense that you’re not falling behind…